ErianaLove

À propos de moi

Nederlands of Engels. Geen interesse in sadisten, subs of vreemdgangers... Ja, ik heb toestemming. En jij? Mijn plezier is in bondage, risky plekken zonder shockering van anderen, ruw, lust, gebruik, en niet in mishandeling, vernedering, bloed, kids, anaal, kledingfetishes en dat soort dingen. Als je dat niet bevalt, ga dan lekker ergens anders heen. Setting up the premise for a new book (erotica/BDSMhorror), while the last one I wrote is getting ready to be published! :D --- Like all those times before I can still hear him every night, his footsteps on the stairs, the creaking of my bedroom door. He whispers 'there is my baby'. I pretend to sleep, but it is no use, like all those times before. I can still feel him every night, how he leans on in, kisses my face, he smells my hair, and lays down next to me. He pushes my pajama's down, his paws clawing at my breasts, like all those times before. I can still smell him every night, how he holds me down and gets on top of me. How he pushes and groans, thrusting his member into me as he unloads. He breath smells, his sweat leaks unto me, like all those times before. My eyes cry silently as I get up to shower, streaming hot water, for over an hour. I wash him off me, my skin itches from scrubbing, as I dry my eyes, wishing him dead. I sleep for a few hours next to the bed, like all those times before. I can still hear him, feel him, smell him, every night when I lay in bed. I turn on my side, trying to forget, but still check for the knife under my pillow. as silently I wait for him and sleep to come, like all those times before, like all those times before. Like all those times before. From my window From my window I can smell the world carried on the summer breeze and though my sight ends on a large brick wall, from my window I can smell the world and I can envision it all. Morning sun Morning sun has dried my eyes which has wept such bitter tears. The night was long and cold as hell, but the light is soothing warm. Not far below me, in it's nest, a bird takes flight once more, as the morning sun dries my tears and I get up, and go. Butterfly I am a butterfly, flitting from flower to flower. When in passion, I can be passionate. When challenged, I can be challenging. When demanded, I can be demanding. But when approached coldly, I am like ice. Please Please, please don't tease. My eyes, your eyes, anyone's eyes, are there to behold the splendor of light's reflection. But hands must stay where they are, without showing their affection. Tanka and Haiku Please light my fire I long for the warmth, a touch a hand, a kiss, again, until I finally break in a blissful ecstasy. Your pleasure, my love is what I give you, my love so you stay, my love. as I light my high another drink is given the night is cold, but as the morning is dawning I will not go home again. Memories Memories come flooding back, empty places with empty spaces, looking for a way to find myself but only finding memories. I cannot forget, nor can I forgive, the things that were done to me, and all the while the memories come in synchronous disharmony. My tears fall as I remember but this time they will heal what was lost must be released Empty places with empty spaces and no escape for me. If only for a while I just need some room to breathe, some place to call my own. I need to lay down my head and rest until my heart has grown. My mind has been jumbled, my mouth has filled with bile, so please, just leave me alone, my dear, if only for a while. I know that you love me, and I know that you so care, But your love, my love, is killing me and I know that it's not fair. When the while is over I don't pretend to know, but when the while is over, my heart, my love, will show. Love is a life to live, love is not a race, in love there are no losers, even when I ask for space. I know that I am leaving, but if telling you is true, through my legs may do the wandering, in my heart there is only you. 2 line poems You cheater, asshole, piece of shit, I hope tonight a bus you'll hit. My heart and arms are empty and I long to live no more. Five hours of sleep and two nightmares. This is no way to live your life. The clock ticks, the wheel turns, and I'll be right here where you left me. I wait for you to return to me, silent and forever. I want to drink all of you inside me, but I'll settle for your cum. At night I turn off the light and lie there wide wake, thinking of you, and when I hear your footsteps, my fear rises of fantasy becoming reality. Revenge is really such sweet sorrow, that I can't wait until tomorrow. My heart is deeper than you'll ever know, because your shallowness knows no bounds. It's not that I don't love you, it's just that there are so many other people to see and do. In darkness you stand, cursing at me for not being there with you. For my Master (where ever he may be) He told me not to cry and so I didn't. He told me to laugh and so I did. He told me I could fly, and so I could. He told me I should die, and so I did. A deeper shade of grey Night falls as I look out into a deeper shade of gray. The street is empty, barren of life, like no one out there anymore, while the lamp posts shine their yellow light to keep away the mist. Why am I still here waiting for you to return, while I know you won't be home. You have been gone, ripped from my arms, but still I wait for you, as the night turns into a deeper shade of gray. So many hours until I'm home It's a long road to go alone. as I see every hour pass lying still in my bed and the landscape never changes. With friends aplenty I still feel alone as people only want to see what they want me to be, not me. Why I am going and to where I just don't know, I just know I am, and it's so many hours until I'm home. Those eyes Those eyes, your eyes, they haunt me every night. They are what I see when I close my eyes and are missing when I open them again. Come back again, let me gaze again, into those eyes, your eyes, and haunt me all the night. If you should ever need me If you should ever need me, know that I am right here. I will wait for you, to come to me, as I can't come to you. Though my heart will break seeing you to go one day, I know when you have to, you will go, But until you go please stay. But if you'd ever need me, where ever I may be and at any point in time, know that I will be right here. Hello Darkness oh, hello darkness it has been a while since you left me alone, lifted the agony, and I was able to smile. But what is cannot be hidden and what was will return time and time again I fall into the trap of yesterday. But I know your face and this time will try harder not to fall and not to listen to what you have to say. Emotional Rollercoaster going up is wonderful excitement building and a world to see, as I wonder why I ever hated this so. But then the rapids flow quicker, spinning, turning, and soon it will make me sick. Up is down and down is up, or maybe that is upside down, Emotions flare and fighting for first place pain, sadness and anger shift as if it is a race. Strapped in and unable to escape I just let go and wait, the little girl inside me hoping it will be over soon. In your hands My hands are bound I am in your power and you own me. I move when you say and do what you tell me to, at your whim I dress or strip. I am yours to do with as you please, I gave myself over to you, in your hands. But if I can ask you for one thing, then please don't share me with your friends. I do I got up though I was still tired and showered though I didn't stink, I went out though there was no way of going and cycled about through I had no goal in mind. I got some lunch though I wasn't really hungry and shared it with ducks who didn't really care I threw a ball though the dog didn't want to fetch it and drank some coffee though I didn't need the buzz. I went home where no one would be waiting and watched TV though nothing was on. I had some dinner though it didn't satisfy me and went to bed to lay awake some more. And tomorrow it would be just the same, noting changes, just days on days, as these are the things I do, I do, when I am lost in thinking of you. Men Most men are awful, most men are a dick Most men smell badly and just make me sick. But then, somehow, the sky will open and show me just the perfect guy, a friendly smile that holds no lies, with his long hair flowing, and kindness in eyes. But next to him there walks his wife, and I wish I was a lesbian, as I just hate my life. Sadness in her eyes There is sadness in her eyes for she knows she must leave me. If she stays, she knows, I will never live without her. But her world is not my own, and her house is not my home. I need to stretch my wings and learn to fly on my own. There is a sadness in my eyes, as I look back, having stretched my wings. My house was not my home, and my world was not my own. If I had strayed, I know, I could never have lived my life. So there's a sadness in my eyes, now I've learned to fly alone. Sane Insanity Fear and pain were all my life Locked inside my mental room But just one day you came my way And now nothing is the same. In your hand, a gilded knife I burned while it touched my skin The searing pain, the scar it left I treasure it while it is here. The weekend passed as we hurt each other While we collided, went and came I felt your hands, your lips, your hips As they kept on thrusting into mine. That morning I just hurt myself Poured candle wax on both my hands My hands still shake and I feel ashamed But the pain in me is gone. When you then left, I waved goodbye And saw I was outside myself People walked and trees just swayed But none of them were you. I feel no fear, I feel no pain I just wait until you come again If this is love that courses through me Then I must be going sane.